Satire

Google Drone Unable to Block Images from Mind

Mountain View, CA—When an out of shape, single man with a predilection toward Doctor Who, Soylent, and Red Bull controls your every move, you no longer find the debate between free will and determinism interesting.

Toddler Delivers Commencement at Smith College

toddler-mic

Kaylee, age 4

Northampton, MA—Breaking new ground in graduation, Smith College, became the first institution of higher education to have a toddler deliver a rousing commencement speech after Christina Lagarde backed out. Though some students criticized Kaylee for her support of Baby Gap and her union-busting tactics against imaginary friends, the protests were muted amongst suggestions that the students might appear guilty of reverse ageism. In her words to the class of 2014, Kaylee urged the students to:
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Hogwarts Launches MOOC

Hogsmeade, England—In a move sure to shake up the wizarding world, Hogwarts will launch it’s first MOOC (massively open otherworldly course) this year.